Lovely.

Child is destroying his room instead of napping because I have no patience for his toddler stuff today.  I just want him to calm down and go to sleep.  Apparently that is too much to ask today.

Hopefully he will go to sleep eventually.  I am over it.  I just want to lie down and take a break.  That may be what I do.

Every nap time feels like a battle.  I am tired of it.  Literally and figuratively.

I have meant to do a post about how my counseling is going, but I have not had the time or the energy.  Hopefully I will get to it this weekend.  I have some stuff I need to work through, and getting it out of my head onto paper may help.  I may also actually journal about it on paper so that I have something to take into my counseling sessions with me.

This morning was not the best.  I got out of the house later than I wanted to, and had to deal with all sorts of stuff this morning.  Grocery shopping, house cleaner, and grandparents.  And coordinating things so that everything could happen at the right time.  I left the house without drinking coffee this morning because I was so out of sorts.  I do not feel like I have ever caught up.

I think I need a break.  I just wish the child was more accommodating.

I think this nap time is going to be about rest for me.  I am going to curl up with a dumb romance novel and just rest.  And let the child destroy his damn room.  I get all tense when I walk in there and even try to deal with it.  As long as he stays in his room, I do not care any more.

Edit:  After he knocked over the humidifier, I went in there and held him down in order to get him to calm down.  (Not hard, just enough to keep him in place.)  He was not happy about it, but he was really, really tired.  He got to sleep not long after he finished crying.  I probably should have done that sooner.  I hate to do it, though.

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4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Merlot
    Mar 21, 2012 @ 23:05:35

    Been there. My little one went through a terrible stage right when I was dealing w/depression and that sort of thing. She was NOT a pleasure for me to be with at all. I don’t know if it will make you feel any bettor not, but when you begin to feel better and less depressed he’ll act out less or maybe he’ll be acting the same and you’ll be able to handle it better. OH yeah, I cleared out her room so her bedroom which we use for time outs or “alone time” as we call it has no toys, all the drawers have child proof locks, and there’s not much to destroy.

    Reply

    • vablondie
      Mar 21, 2012 @ 23:09:36

      That is exactly what I think I need to do. He just gets so wound up, I cannot talk to him when he is mid-tantrum. And he will not stay in his room, so I cannot get the decompress time I need to deal with it. Not sure what to do.

      Reply

  2. Kelly
    May 30, 2012 @ 14:08:16

    I just found you through ask moxie- oh man I feel your pain. My son isn’t as old as yours (he’s 19 months) but he’s very similar in regards to sleep. One night last week I tried for almost 2 hours to get him to go to sleep (for a nap). I’m still breastfeeding and we cosleep so that’s a bonus, but sometimes not so much. I know exactly what you mean about decompress time. And I deal with depression, have been battling it since I was a teenager. I’m currently on Zoloft which has been very helpful, and I will be starting therapy again next week. I don’t know how it is for you and your hubby but I am the primary caregiver in my house and that makes things extra difficult at times. My son only wants me and I’m trying to make dinner, that sort of thing. OK I’ve rambled on enough. Write me if you want.

    Reply

    • vablondie
      May 30, 2012 @ 22:34:36

      Thanks so much for comment. Having been through it, I would say that it does get better. Sort of. Though I guess it is more that the problems change. I am hoping for a break once Little Guy hits age 5, though I am not sure it will really happen.

      Hang in there. Sleep deprivation really sucks.

      Reply

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