I must be crazy.

After day like today that is exactly how I feel.  Why the hell am I putting myself through this for another child.  The one we have is a lot of work!

Child was up at his usual 5:45 AM, and then hung out with daddy for a bit.  Eventually I took him grocery shopping and then to a farm store.  After that we went swimming.  Then he did not take a nap.  He was crazy and would melt down over everything all day.  Child did get outside to play in the dirt and run around a bit.  Hubby also came home early to help.  But it was exhausting.  I felt like I could not do anything right.  (I know, I did manage to grocery shop, fold clothes, clean the kitchen a little bit, and fix dinner.  So I got some stuff done.)

Just feeling really low.  And hoping everything works out.  And hoping I am not crazy.

This time around I do not have the time to soak in the experience and deal with the emotions.  I have to take it as it comes and find the time around everything else.  Child is still needing a lot of time and energy, work keeps me busy and I need to tend my marriage, too.

And in FET news…

I had a bunch of day 2 pn blasts.  They unfroze 4, and only two survived.  I was given the option to only unfreeze two more and risk not having good enough day 5 blasts or unfreezing all of them.  I went all in, and hope for the best.  If this cycle does not work, we can unfreeze one of the day 5 from this cycle or the previous IVF.  Fingers crossed we have good blasts at the end of the week.

Off to watch Dancing with the Stars and drink a little wine at the end of the day.

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